My darling girl,
I know I will have many stories to tell you when you are old enough to listen so I have decided to write this because my memory is not as good as it used to be when I was ten. Also, I was about ten when I discovered that your grandmother had me when she was twenty six and her mother was the twenty six too when she had her. I have not had you yet so I do not want this year to go by unnoticed. This is the year you come alive for me. At one point in my teenage years I really thought this would be the year that I met you or any of your siblings…that’s if you have any. I was wrong clearly…there’s been a whirlwind of stuff that has stalled your arrival and that, among other things (I will likely keep explaining this in future letters) is why I am writing you these letters. You will be a young lady one day too. When you get here, I do not want to preach to you (so am gonna let out as much as I can now because most likely you won’t even want to listen to me anyway ).
These letters might help you get through the tough days or crack you up or maybe you’ll just feel like you are talking me, the me before you. I do not know anything and will likely still be learning more when you are my age but I hope some of this jibberish comes in handy.
Something scary happened over the weekend. I started flirting with the idea that maybe I might not to have children…i.e you. This feeling is new to me. I have always wanted to be a mother. The story of how I began to feel this way is for another day. So I am writing to you because despite my fears, I would really love to meet you. I do not tell my mother everything and I do not expect that you will either but I want to tell you as much as I can now, before I am unable to and before I start filtering. I know we will fight (kids do that a lot these days, never happened in my momma’s days, parents were always right) but I always want you to know I love you. Always will. No matter what. I also want you to know that many people will tell you they love you but not all of them always will. So I will begin now … and I always will.
By the time you are old enough to make sense of any of this, a lot will have changed in the world. I live in Kampala and work at one of the media houses as a sub editor (read slave). I am at work right now. May be you will like to read (newspapers are boring) and maybe you won’t. May be we will not have newspapers anymore during your time or maybe we will. Things are changing a lot faster than they did a decade ago.
Here’s to us, me and you.